Angry Dykes

I was at a party Saturday night, having a lovely time. I was chit-chatting with some lesbians, bein rowdy and crazy. So, a new group of dykes came in and I assumed I could be just as forward with them. I asked to see a woman's tattoo, and reached to move the strap of her tank top aside. She got all upset and told me not to touch her, and I responed by saying "You aren't a lady!" I don't even know what I meant, by this, just that she wasn't being very gracious about the whole thing.

She stormed out, caused a scene, threatened me, called me a faggot and freaked out. I went to the front yard, apologized for upsetting her, said it wasn't intentional and told her she should just come back in and have fun. She wasn't having it.

It's pride weekend and everyone is drunk and having fun and being obnoxious, just calm down lezzie mclezster! Just let your mullet down, have another PBR and have some fun. Someone needs dick, and bad!

Grade: F


Blogger Noah said...

She called you an "asswipe". I'm still giggling about it. In a way, it was all kinds of awesome.

11:48 AM, June 27, 2006  
Blogger carl d said...

They sometimes scare me, there is one in partcular in my neighboorhood that I alway see. She looks likes the lippy pouty one on the L word. I feel like she wants to beat me up just for fun. I could take her though.

12:09 PM, June 27, 2006  
Anonymous Brady said...

No you di'n't!

Angry dykes scare me too!

12:42 PM, June 27, 2006  
Blogger elisepeterson said...

simply hilarious. i am laughing to myself about the whole incident. wish i could have seen that one...

1:30 PM, June 27, 2006  
Blogger Chicago_Sexbox said...

Wow, and I thought it was just me who thought lesbians were lacking a sense of humor! Not all of them of course, but I have had similar experiences.

2:08 PM, June 27, 2006  
Blogger Erin said...

funny story...found your blog through someone else's blog, and am laughing all the way through reading it...you should have just started bitch-slapping her...

9:40 PM, June 27, 2006  
Blogger Robbie said...

It could have been worse

Someone could have thrown that dead rat in the alley at you.

Great to hang with you at the party - angry dykes aside

2:17 PM, June 28, 2006  
Blogger Michael said...

This is sorta a tangent, but I got up early on Sunday and walked around on Broadway for a while shortly after 10 a.m., two hours before the parade. By about 10:30 I was just sitting near Melrose Restaurant enjoying the people watching, and it struck me that about 8 out of every 10 people walking by was a lesbian.

All I could figure is that the gay boys were still dragging themselves out of bed with a Hydrate Hangover or in the bathroom applying. Lesbians are lucky I guess, cause you can get ready pretty quickly when you don't have to put on makeup and have a buzz cut.

But I think they knew what I was thinking so I got scared and hid in Universal Gear.

11:34 PM, June 28, 2006  
Blogger Acme Instant Food said...

"Angry Lesbians" redundant isn't it?


1:58 PM, June 29, 2006  
Anonymous jimmy said...

i hate women. all of them. except for melanie--she's not a lady.

6:04 AM, July 01, 2006  
Blogger asspanther said...

Hey there, found your blog throuh the boomtacular and I really enjoy it. That said, perhaps maybe you should have let the angy dyke say 'yes, you may see my tatoo' and perhaps she then would have moved the strap on her tank top.... ha! I wrote strap on! .... my experience with the angry dykes is that they are like yor average house cat, they have to warm up to you first. if you try to pet it too soon, it will scratch your eyes out.

12:54 AM, July 07, 2006  

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